Sherlock BBC1

SHERLOCK was having trouble finding a case that interested him last night. Then up popped a dominatrix from Belgravia with compromising photos of a leading member of the aristocracy.

My money was on Prince Andrew, although you can never rule out the Earl of Grantham in these situations.

It was a case led the pipe-smoking violin-playing sleuth, based largely on Reg Hollis from The Bill, into the most unexpected territory. For by the end of the episode Sherlock and the handcuff-wielding disciplinarian were in love.

To be honest, I don't recall many whip-cracking dominatrices in the Arthur Conan Doyle stories I read as a boy. They were more likely to be found in the more obscure adventures of the Famous Five. But the BBC can feasibly introduce PVC into Sherlock Holmes' life by setting his adventures in the modern day.

It's a trick which also allows the gumshoe to send and receive texts. "I can see Tower Bridge and the moon from my room," the object of his desires, Irene Adler, revealed. "Work out where I am and join me."

My guess was in a hotel room with three MPs, but Sherlock may well have known better.

"You looked sexy on Crimewatch," she messaged him later. Although, next to an E-fit of a getaway driver, that's not all that difficult.

Baffled, the police had brought the case to Holmes. "She provides recreational scolding for those who enjoy that kind of thing and are prepared to pay for it," they revealed of Irene. And while you may well wonder just who that is, it's worth bearing in mind there are a good number of High Court judges in London.

"I could cut myself slapping that face," she noted of Sherlock's pronounced cheekbones on introduction. "Would you like me to try?" Sherlock wasn't keen. They were still a bit sore from carving the turkey on Christmas Day.

Irene denied she was attracted to Sherlock, but he knew better. "Your pupils dilated," he told her. It's the kind of intimate chat he shares with Doc Martin.

"I imagine John Watson thinks love is a mystery to me," he added. "The chemistry is actually very simple and is very destructive."

True – just look at Heather Mills and Paul McCartney.

"You don't honestly think I was interested in you?" she blustered. "Why? Because you're the great Sherlock Holmes in a funny hat?"

In the end, the pair went their separate ways. Irene has now turned her attentions to another deerstalker-clad hunk. Look out for pictures of her stepping out with John McCririck.