I KNOW I no longer love my husband.

We have been together for 29 years and he was my first boyfriend from when I was 15.

I'm scared to leave. I want to, but am frightened of going it alone.

I fantasise about having my own little home, cosy and quiet, but the upheaval to get there scares me, so I keep putting it off.

I am 45 this year and know my life is passing me by.

I have horrible thoughts that if he just died it would all be so easy.

I'd have enough to live on, could stay in our home and have none of the upheaval.

I hate myself for thinking this way, but I feel so stuck.

I accept you feel your relationship is at an end and you want to leave.

That said, separating is not easy.

It is tough, emotionally exhausting, costly at times and disruptive, which is why it is a difficult decision to make, but there is no point staying if you are unhappy.

You may need to call on family and close friends to rally round and support you, whether it is for practical or emotional support.

It can feel daunting, but lots of couples do go through this process and come out the other side, perhaps feeling a little battered and bruised, but they soon adapt to their new lives.

OUR baby is only four months old and my husband keeps pressing me for sex.

He doesn't realise how tired I am, as I just want to get into bed and sleep.

Giving birth to our baby was not as difficult as I anticipated. However, with constant demands of feeding, changing and looking after the house, I am just exhausted.

It's causing rows. He feels rejected and I feel unsupported. How do I break out of this vicious cycle before our marriage becomes threatened?

It's very common to feel exhausted when coping with a newborn.

Your husband clearly is hoping though that your sex life is back on track and him pressurising you only creates resentment.

Try explaining that to him first.

The question of tiredness and feeling unsupported – is he helping you enough?

He may need to realise that by supporting you more, you are less tired and therefore are more likely to feel sexual.

This gives you both what you want, support for you and closeness rather than rejection for him.

If you find you are unable to resolve this, I suggest couple counselling before, as you say, your marriage is threatened.